We had the IVF evaluation at the hospital yesterday and the message was blunt. There is nothing that they can do for us anymore. I do not react well to the hormones and they do not see any added value of putting me through another IVF cycle. The doctor compaired doing a cycle with us having sex. Changes of our own child are really low either way.
I do not agree. First of all it is a lot more fun when we have sex and a zillion times more romantic. The whole IVF concept is pretty weird, come to think of it. Making a baby is supposed to be something intimate, something of two people together. When it didn't work that way for us, we soon put all inhibitions aside. Suddenly a lot more people were involved in the making of our baby. Voila, the baby project was born.
Second, our indication is severe male factor. In order words, the sperms will not penetrate the egg cells on their own. Ever (Jonny says that technically this is possible, but the chances are very very slim). ICSI is a way to overcome this problem. This means there is definitely added value in doing the treatment. Even with a small number of eggs. After all, embryo quality has been okay and one good embryo is all it takes. A small chance is still a chance.
Despite liking the more personal approach of this hospital, so far we have nothing to show for it. I have been labeled as being a poor ovarian responder, based on one FSH reading (it varies from month to month), after an operation that turned out to be unneccesary (my left ovary has refused to function since) and one and a half IVF cycles. I do not react well to surpression. Or too well if you like. I am sure that I would respond better on a different protocol. In fact it might be the doctors who are poor ovarian stimulators.
We do not react well to bad news either.... Can we just doubt their professional and objective opinions? Are we turning obsessive? Have we turned into sour cynics if we question their motivation and think that their success rates might be a factor? We are not quite sure what to do next. Try again with IVF #4? A new clinic? Donor eggs? Adoption? Give up?
One thing we are quite sure about: we are not ready to give up!
4 comments:
Hi Flo
We are at a loss to know what is going on, We thought the whole point of IVF was to help couples overcome the difficulties and conceive. It seems they are washing their hands of you after one and half attempts, so you have to wonder why. Is it as you say looking after their percentages ? Maybe they have damaged your ovary and are frightened of litigation. We just do not understand.
What ever the reason you have to find out why, another opinion is necassary. If you are not confident with consultants in the Netherlands, We believe there are good ones in the UK, maybe you could submit your excellent blog to a consultant here.
We love you both, will speak to soon.
XXX Krys & Geoff
Dear Flo
Dear Jonny
We changed also die clinic after much things go wrong there.
It is so important to find a good doctor who knows what he has to do with YOU; not a /doctor clinic, where you are only a number and which are only making the protocol as it is wroting on their paper.
You need a doctor with brain and heart !!
I also think you need another opinion, bevore you start thinking about giving up or adoption...
Don't you know other IVF-couples ? Maybe they can give you a good tip.
Love, Serap (sorry for my english ;-)
Flo
Have a look at this link, support and advice.
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/content/view/221/100/
Geoff
Hey Flo,
you know i'm doing that different protocol for that exact same reason... i would say; go find that other clinic! it is way to soon to give up!
heard very positive thing about the belgium clinic in Leuven...
lot's of virtual hugs!
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